Nursing Moms: A Greatest Hits List

Today marked the last day of World Breastfeeding Week 2011. There have been events all week long- some of which you might have heard about through a local media outlet or social networking sites. What an great way to share and celebrate the awesomeness that nursing a baby is! Yesterday La Leche League USA sponsored "The Big Latch On" event where Moms and nurslings came together in public places to promote breastfeeding and aid in public awareness of breastfeeding. Over 4000 mamas and babies participated in this event at over 294 locations world-wide! Some La Leche League chapters sponsored picnics and moms around the world promoted nursing through Facebook and Twitter by announcing their participation in status updates or by posting pictures of themselves nursing their babies.

In recognition of World Breastfeeding Week and of the unbelievable joy I have found in nursing my own baby, following are a few lists of "Bests" of breastfeeding, according to me, at least.

Best Nursing Products: You don't need a million products to breastfeed your baby. In fact, you really only need your boobs, and, well, your BABY! But some products are fun and can make life easier!

1. Undercover Mama: No one wants to show off their post-baby belly to the world while nursing and shirts designed for breastfeeding with special openings or panels can be very costly - and not too cute! These tops turn any shirt into a nursing top and cost much less!




2. Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle: These supplements (herbs) have been used throughout history to help nursing mama's increase their milk supply. This is especially helpful for moms who want to increase their stockpile of milk or moms returning to work who plan to pump frequently.

3. Loved Baby Nursing Shawl: Breastfeeding is very special between mothers and their little ones. But sometimes we want to keep it that way--between us and our little one and not share everything we've got with the world. This shawl is very versatile and has many other uses; I've used it as a blanket, burp cloth, a playmat on the floor, and in a pinch, in a public diaper changing area where I didn't want to lay my baby down. The shawl comes in several colors and is a casual cover for nursing in public - unlike some covers that more closely resemble the shower curtain Halloween costume from The Karate Kid movie. In addition to being very useful the shawl is beautiful, washes very nicely and doesn't wrinkle!

4. Lansinoh Lanolin Cream: This is really a miracle cream for sore or cracked nipples. It's great for dry skin and chapped lips too! Available at most major retailers.

5. Washable Nursing Pads: Even though disposable nursing pads are available- washable ones are more comfortable and absorb better. And they come in awesome prints like these!

6. Electric Breastpump. There are several brands available and they vary in price. Medela pumps are housed in discreet black bags and are often preferred by moms who will need to take their pump to work. If they seem too expensive for you look for a good used pump and purchase new tubing, valves, and membranes through a retailer like Amazon. Sometimes hospitals and birthing centers rent breastpumps to moms who don't have funds to purchase their own.

7. Boppy Pillow: Some moms prefer the "My Brest Friend" pillow but the Boppy seems to have more long term use - like propping baby up and aiding in sitting up on the floor when baby gets bigger.

8. Nursing Tank Tops: These are great for sleeping and wearing around the house. The clasps allow for good coverage but quick and easy access for nursing your little one. (Much better than hiking up your sleep shirt or nightgown!) Check out this brand for pretty tops around $15 each.




Best Advice from Other Moms: When it comes to having a baby, everyone (EVERYONE!) has advice for the new mom. In my experience, successful breastfeeding moms have some of the very best advice though. This is what I learned:

1. Attend a La Leche League meeting BEFORE your baby is born.

2. KEEP GOING to La Leche League meetings AFTER your baby arrives! Moms in these groups can help new moms be successful and overcome problems or discomforts with nursing.

3. Smile and nod! Others are bound to make insensitive or irritating comments about your choice to breastfeed. Sometimes its best to just smile and nod and let the comment pass. (Disclaimer: This is much easier said than done!)

4. Don't buy a stockpile of nursing bras before your baby is born. Purchase one or two comfortable bras ahead of time and the rest after baby arrives. It's hard to know when you're pregnant exactly what will fit you once your milk comes in. You can save a lot of hassle by waiting until a few weeks after baby is born to purchase as many bras as you think you will need. The best kind to start off with are soft sleeping bras or sport-style nursing bras.

5. You don't necessarily have to spend a lot of money to get a good nursing bra. Check out stores like Target and Motherhood Maternity for a good selection of low-cost nursing bras.

6. Drink plenty of water! Keep a large cup or water bottle with you all of the time and refill it often! Staying hydrated is key to breastfeeding success.

7. Don't worry about losing the baby weight right away. Nursing your baby and drinking plenty of water will help you lose the weight safely over time and not at the expense of your health or milk supply.

8. Make friends with other nursing moms! Their support and friendship will be invaluable. If you can't find someone in your local area, join an online forum through a site like Mothering.

9. Change nursing holds frequently. This can help ease engorgement and maintain milk supply. It can also help relieve the symptoms of mastitis.

10. Learn the side-lying nursing hold. This position allows you and your baby to relax together.

11. Find and utilize a lactation consultant. Try to find a consultant who can come to your home and help you learn proper latch and nursing positions in your own environment. We spent about $120 for this service when our baby was born but my husband declared it to be the best $120 we ever spent! If you have your baby in a hospital there is sometimes a consultant on staff. (Be sure to ask if she is IBLCE certified though as more moms are reporting nurses with only workshop hours in lactation posing as consultants!)

12. Consider co sleeping with your baby. This can help maintain adequate supply and help mom and baby BOTH get more rest than getting up and going to the baby's room several time each night to nurse.

12. Read The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.

13. Wear your baby. Babywearing has many of advantages including bonding, some hands-free time for mom, and babywearing can help soothe a fussy baby. Some research also indicates that babywearing can help mothers produce and adequate milk supply.




Best Breastfeeding Websites: Sometimes a Google search can render more results than anyone can begin to search through or decode. These websites offer great advice for getting started with breastfeeding, finding solutions for issues, and getting the support moms need.

1. La Leche League International: Established by seven women in 1956 (after breastfeeding rates in the United States dropped to nearly 20%) to help, support, and educate mothers who wish to breastfeed.

2. La Leche League in the USA: the U.S. branch of LLLI. Offers links to local chapters and a Breastfeeding Helpline.

3. Mothering: Mothering Magazine was created in 1976 and continues today as a web company. Moms can find information on many natural parenting related topics, including breastfeeding.

4. Peaceful Parenting: A blog devoted to kind parenting offers many breastfeeding related articles.

5. Ask Dr. Sears: William Sears, MD and Martha Sears, RN. Pediatrician and parents of eight children, Dr. Bill and Martha offer advice on many parenting related issues they've encountered in their own family and through 40 years in pediatrics.

Still Waiting For the Big Reveal: Blogging for Books: What Are You Waiting For: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex. A Review.

The following is a book review for the Blogging for Books program through Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing. The publisher's posting of this review can be found here.

What Are You Waiting For: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex by Dannah Gresh, is the author's newest book in her campaign to encourage women to maintain sexual purity until marriage. Gresh covers a variety of topics relating to sex and sexuality in sixteen chapters and 178 pages. Several of the chapter titles seem particularly riveting including "The Lesbian Question", "Friends With Benefits" and chapters designated for topics including pornography and masturbation. Gresh claims that her book holds the secret to fulfilling sex and the reason that women should hold sex as sacred and reserved for their husbands.

In this book Gresh adequately answers some relevant questions about sex and aids readers in navigating issues complicated by pop culture and media. Her conversation regarding the effect of pornography on love and marriage illustrates that a brain addicted to porn can lose it's sensitivity and capability to love because it is overcome by lust. She uses scientific explanations to describe how the porn addicted brain is desensitized to love and becomes hooked on the need for pornographic stimulus. Gresh also gives readers advice concerning relationships in which pornography is an established problem.

The author gives useful advice to young women seeking to maintain their sexual purity and helps readers to not cross "the line" into premarital sex. She discusses kissing, fondling, and the burning question of whether or not oral sex is really sex. She offers readers helpful advice for refraining from situations in which their intentions could be compromised by physical desires. She also urges young girls to practice modesty in their clothing choices to avoid creating situations in which sexual temptation is more difficult to resist.

Gresh carefully weaves scientific information throughout the book and explains how the female human brain reacts to sexual stimuli through the creation of oxytocin which creates a chemical attachment to the sexual partner. Gresh calls this chemical attachment "emotional glue" (p. 114) and asserts that this is why casual sex is not possible; every sexual encounter causes the participants to be emotionally bonded whether they choose to be or not. Gresh also uses scientific evidence to illustrate how physical love is biologically emotional and that human sex is biologically different than sex between animals. (p.43-44) She also explains to readers that "not all sex is the same" (p.35) and encourages readers to search for the experience of sex that goes beyond only the physical act.

One of the author's more triumphant moments is her illustration of the standard that Christian women are called to. She demonstrates that communion with God is not a pious attitude and living as close to the sexual line as possible without sinning. She indicates that closeness with God comes from living honestly and performing regular self-checks to maintain an honest and strong relationship with God. She calls her readers to pursue "a life that is free from any hint of sexual sin." (p.118)

The book falls short in several instances though including rather simple theology that does not leave readers with much sense of spiritual growth. Although her discussion of the Hebrew language and her examination of the Bible's original meaning in verses relating to sex and sexuality are interesting, they are not quite deep enough to be more than somewhat impressive. The point of this book, the secret that Gresh promises to share, is not revealed until chapter four of the book, and when revealed, does not really offer anything particularly mind-blowing.

The author's writing style is also somewhat distracting as she seems to be overly intent on connecting with a younger generation rather than communicating her ideas. Words and phrases such as "girl", "push pause, push play" (p.112) and references to establishments in her immediate locale (p.134) make it difficult to focus on the topics she believes are important. Although this writing style may be appropriate for teenaged readers it is probably not appealing to readers at the college level or beyond. Additionally, Gresh tries to add relevance to some of her topics through inclusion of comments made and questions posed by young (college age) women. Unfortunately her research pool is not very broad and in chapter 12, "The Line", her conversations with college age girls seem to be restricted to only her two interns. (p.111)

The work is not free from the commonplace Christian guilt on this particular subject either. Gresh relates a conversation she had with a young woman who had allowed a recent boyfriend to get "under her shirt" (p. 45) and the woman's deep sense of guilt and shame regarding the incident. Gresh indicates that she encouraged this young woman by reassuring her of "how much of herself she still had to give to her future husband." (p.45) While this seems like an excellent point of consolation, it seems that some reference to God's forgiveness and a repentant spirit might be more relevant to spiritual growth than a conversation about one's future spouse. In a later chapter, Gresh uses verbiage that seems condescending and sententious when she discusses "preparing your heart to confess (sexual sin) to your future husband" (p. 125). Additionally, her advice regarding sharing past behaviors with a boyfriend until "you are certain that the relationship is headed toward marriage" (p. 123), although well-meaning, may disappoint young women who wait too long to share important details of their lives with future partners.

What Are You Waiting For, regrettably, left me waiting for something of a little more substance. This book claims to be more ambitious than it actually is and, although it covers relevant topics, it only minimally does so. Sixteen chapters in 178 pages does not leave much room for real depth and spiritual growth. The author seems to be more intent on convincing women to maintain sexual purity than on fostering a deeper relationship with God.

The book is probably best for girls between 13-17 years old. The writing style and minimal spiritual depth will probably cause disappointment in older readers. I would recommend this book to young girls interested in this topic and who are beginning question the biblical significance of sexuality and encounter the many sexual issues and questions that are prevalent in modern culture. It would also be a useful tool for parents (particularly mothers) of teenage girls who are looking for an avenue to discuss these issues and questions with their daughters.

For a chance to win a FREE copy of this book, please rate my review here.

I received this book from the publisher.

Babies and Stuffitis: The Marketing Campaign to Empty Your Wallet. Part 2 - Ignoring the Force-Fed Guilt to Determine What You Need!

Read Part 1 of this article here. A Google search for "list of necessary baby items" resulted in more than 52 million hits. This is not terribly surprising, considering the target audience of baby items, the monstrous marketing campaign for all things baby as well as the ability of Google to find anything and everything on the web. Conservatively we can say that maybe one quarter of those hits are actually relevant to the search topic- this still leaves over 12 million results perhaps slightly related to the subject at hand: babies and stuffitis.

The most common items listed in the search were things like a crib, crib mattress, stroller, infant carseat, highchair, playpen (pack-n-play), changing table, rocker, diapers, formula, and the list goes on and on and on. It is incredible the amount of stuff that Google thinks babies need! Okay, so maybe not Google - but the fact is - babies really don't need all of the stuff that the world seems to think they do.

Babycenter.com offers a baby cost calculator that estimates the one-time costs that most parents will have in preparing for their baby. The average total amount of these items is $2058. By adding a few luxury items the one-time costs rise to a staggering $3031! Sadly, this amount does not include ALL of the items that are suggested (or needed) by first time parents- things like a convertible car seat (used after baby reaches the 25-30 pound weight limit of the infant carseat/carrier), or a breast-pump- required of breastfeeding moms who return to work!

How are parents supposed to navigate these giant lists of things, the advice of well-meaning friends and family, and end up with enough to adequately care for baby without breaking the bank? It's actually quite simple. IGNORE all of it. This doesn't mean that parents should not prepare for the arrival of their baby or that there is anything wrong with accumulating things that will be required. But the trick is to accumulate things that YOU will require. Not that others require or suggest, and certainly not what major merchandisers so kindly suggest that you will need.

The best way to prepare for YOUR baby is to talk about how you plan to raise your baby. What parenting style will you use? What do you wish to teach your child? What kind of lifestyle do you want your baby to have? What expectations about things do you want to foster in your child?

If you intend to follow the guidelines of attachment parenting, you may want to forgo a crib and purchase a co-sleeper for your baby instead. If you want to keep your baby close to you to help her adjust to the world then you might choose a baby-wearing device such as a sling, wrap, or soft-structure carrier instead of a stroller.

If your family is concerned with saving money and reducing waste, perhaps cloth diapering- at least part time- is an option for you. Likewise, if you are concerned with using only organic, chemical-free, and other natural products for your baby you may consider exclusively breastfeeding and using cloth diapers full-time.

If you are concerned about raising a child who is overly preoccupied with (and over-stimulated by!) things and wish to foster creativity within your child rather than entertaining them with battery-powered toys, look around your home for items that are safe and practical for your baby to play with as he/she grows. There are very few parents who don't recall wiht humor at least one instance of their child cleaning out a kitchen cabinet full of pots and pans or plastic ware!

Beware of the temptation to buy all new things for your baby. Having some new things is lovely, however, having ALL new things is absolutely not necessary and does not contribute to your baby's well-being as much as happily involved parents do! And it's difficult to be happily involved if you are worried about money. Consider purchasing items second-hand at baby-themed consignment sales or stores, online through sites like Ebay, or from other moms you know (Don't know any moms? Attend a La Leche League meeting!) Even if money is a non-issue for you, consider purchasing some things second hand anyway- finding a good deal gives a great sense of accomplishment AND you'll be truly surprised at the exceptionally short amount of time your baby uses (or is interested in) some "necessary" items.

Following are a few items that we have not found useful or necessary and some of the items that we use instead. Some things we found we simply not useful at all.

Crib: Our daughter has not slept in it. Not even once. We use an Arms Reach co sleeper instead.

Stroller: Carrying baby leads to better attachment and bonding. We like to use an ErgoBaby or a ring-sling carrier like a Maya Wrap.

Infant Carseat: We did not purchase an infant carseat because convertible carseats are designed for babies from 5 pounds to between 45 - 80 pounds (depending on the brand and style) so they are useful much longer than the infant seat which only holds baby up to 25-30 pounds. The convertible carseat does not double as a baby carrier as the infant seat does but we prefer to carry/wear our baby. Before you purchase an infant seat, consider that it is possible for your baby to spend many hours in the seat without touch from another human. The convenience of these seats (home to car, car to stroller, stroller to restaurant car seat sling etc) can lead to your baby receiving much less touch from you than you may prefer or realize.

Baby Bath Towels: Regular bath towels work just fine. But they aren't quite as cute. ;)

Baby Bath Robe: We've never used this....and can't figure out in what circumstance it could be easier than dressing the baby...or why we would want her to be without a diaper after a warm bath anyway!

Boppy Seed Lounger: Our baby fit in this for about 15 minutes. Not worth the $30 investment!






One of the easiest (and hardest!) ways to stay out of the baby-stuff-trap is to wait until baby arrives to purchase things that will not be used right away. It's very easy (and fun!) to get caught up in buying cute baby gear, but parents might find later on that the $150 pack-n-play or a $160 baby swing weren't really as necessary- or as convenient- as they had hoped. Waiting to purchase things are they become necessary can result in substantial cost savings and can keep the accumulation of expensive baby things to a minimum.

Don't miss out on the enjoyable parts of preparing for the arrival of your baby. But don't get caught up in what the world thinks you need either. The best way for new parents to prepare for baby is to talk about how they want to raise their baby and how that effects the things they will need to be prepared for his or her arrival. These conversations and preparation go much further than a crib set toward helping baby to succeed in life; parents who agree on a parenting style are much more prepared than those who only agree on a nursery theme.

Go ahead and enjoy getting ready for your little one, but think about all of the cash you can free up to dump into a college fund if you can avoid the baby-stuff trap!